ok so i'm sitting here at Shiva's internet cafe, drinking a schweppes ginger beer (treat, treat, treat) and eating something new i'd try.... don't know if you could even consider it food, really, although i am ingesting it. \they are called "Fun Flips" .... i thought they were potato chips but they are some puffy snacky thing, a bit like pork rinds in canada, which i think are disgusting, so these are like vegetarian flavoured pork rinds. \the flavour name is "tango". i don't know what the heck that is.
anyhow, i was looking over my last couple of posts, and laughing. because i apologized for not writing that often, but i realized i had been writing, quite regularily lately, i just hadn't been WRITING writing, if you know what i mean. never in the headspace to spin a tale even about the most mundane things. But as i sit here with my ginger beer, i can't help but smile at myself, at this scene, drinking ginger beer, (which is deliciously cold, by the way) and eating strange indian chip snacky things and looking at a roll of toilet paper that i just purchased that's sitting in front of me, i can't help but be amused at the scene. About the guilty pleasure of snack foods and sugary carbonated drinks as i strive to further purify my mind and body.
I feel that I am starting to relax now, now that i finished the teacher training i set out here to do, after wrapping up a two week stint of teaching everyday.... i am starting to relax. I was so tense that my back wouldn't hold out and on and on... i've been tense about so many things during this trip and life is like that. I mean, i don't think we do it by nature, or that its natural, but i think that mostly we live in this state of constant tension like "when this thing happens, then everything will be good" or "once i have this thing in place, then i can relax", like a new job, or a certain kind of training, or a relationship or a new car... all these things that we strive for that keep us out of the moment. ...that keep us from enjoying the ginger beer and view of the toilet paper in front of us.
Like my mom doing "warrior" yoga pose at the beach and feeling all uplifted and free and bringing her face down to fresh dog poop. i hope she doesn't mind me sharing that story.
I don't know what i am trying to get at here. I guess just that everything is exactly how it needs to be, and life is perfect, just as it is, even in the poop. Even when everything seems poopy, there is perfection.
Then that is when it is the hardest to remember this lesson, of course, at least it is for me.
philisophical rantings.
good news. i just bought a pen drive 2mb to download music onto to take home and i find out from my friend Ashok, the owner of Shiva internet cafe, that he doesn't charge to put music from the collection he has on his computer onto my pen drive, only if i download it from the internet! This is fabulous news as he has some excellent music and the music stores here all charge fat fees to put music on your mp3 or pen drive.
I can't believe i am eating these totally, artificial in every way, puffy snacks. They are going to give me a tummy ache.
and i can't stop eating them. That being said.... cold ginger beer never tasted so good.
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